Talk Dirty

Some of us like to talk dirty with a girl when we are making love or should I say fucking her. I’m a little old fashioned or maybe we should call it repressed because I know a lot of women enjoy listening to it, but my initial reaction is that it’s disrespectful. It’s usually the same women who like a bit of slap on the arse during sex. I’ve met a few like that and I must admit I find it very sexy to give a girl a slap and here her moan her appreciation rather than turning round and punching me in the face.
Why are people like this? I’m thinking about it now for the first time really and I guess it’s about the sex act being us at our most animalistic. Sex is a natural response, like sneezing. It’s involuntary, it’s an instinct. I remember my first real attraction at school was aged 11. Now this was years ago when 11 year olds didn’t wear bra’s and hang around drinking in parks. This was a time of innocence when an 11 year old was generally still considered a child. Her name was Julie and she was my first infatuation. I was besotted with her and yet at only 11 myself I didn’t really know why. Up till then girls had been very uninteresting compared to football or cricket. Suddenly I’m obsessed with this girl. No one sat me down with a book and said look it’s time for you to get interested in girls. We didn’t get our sex education at school until we were about 15 so by then all the guys were wanking furiously and the lucky ones were already having sex. They’d figured it out for themselves. Julie remained an unrequited love throughout school.
Sex is natural and if you strip back all the conventions and the rules of society that we’ve attached to it, you are basically left with a caveman and a cavewoman. This is before internet dating of course. The strongest caveman would fight the other caveman for cavewoman. I’d guess they’d be looking for a cavewoman with nice hips to help with child birth and big tits to feed the babies. Does that criteria sound familiar? Now the woman isn’t going to have much say in the matter. Once the dominant man has won his battles, this woman is NOT going to be able to turn around and say sorry you’re not my type. So she’d better buy into this concept of survival of the fittest. It’s hard to imagine that once this guy has defeated his rivals in battle for the right to fuck the girl he’s then going to busy himself making the cave ready by lighting scented candles and putting on a Barry White CD. No my guess is it’s going to be much closer to the animal kingdom…a quick sniff of the arse and then straight in there with force if necessary. Well that’s going to hurt unless that pussy is wet and ready. So you can see that nature will make sure that the girl is turned on by the site of this man fighting for the right to fuck her. It’s going to set those juices flowing and the thought of him then jumping on top of her without so much as a ‘would you mind awfully’ has also got to be a turn on. Otherwise it’s going to make sex more difficult and risk the procreation of the species.
I would suggest that deep inside us there is a part of our brain still hotwired to behave like this. It’s only society and Cosmopolitan magazine that’s told women they have the right to orgasm and to play hard to get on the first date. It could all change tomorrow. If someone dropped a huge bomb on the UK or a virus spread through our society and reduced us to survival of the fittest. How long would it be before your witty chat up lines in the club would be redundant for pulling girls? My guess is pretty quickly you’re going to find you’re new competition is that bouncer on the front door of the club. You know the one who’s about 7 foot tall and doesn’t have a sense of humour. That’s the guy who’s going to take your ‘Julie’ away from you, not the Merchant Banker with the flat in Clerkenwell and a Porsche.
So, I think now I understand why we like ‘dirty talk’. It’s our brains being hotwired back to the days where sex was purely about ensuring the survival of the race. In that context the roughest, toughest, strongest caveman had to be a woman’s perfect partner not the merchant banker and for the survival of our race, she better be turned on by his direct approach and less than perfect table manners!!

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